Tuesday, 21 July 2009

Pelt Up

Oh God. Middle son has just watched Veet Advert on telly. Woman with legs up to armpits taking Non-Existent Hairs off Hairless Leg.



Middle Son notices that woman only does her legs up to knees.
'Why doesn't she do all of her leg?' he asks no one in particular.
'It'll look way better.'
I look at him over my cup of tea.
'Why will it look better?' I ask, worriedly.
'Because otherwise it'll be Hairy. Derrr.'
Ker-ist.
The poor boy thinks every woman under ninety is as Hairy as his Mother. On a Bad Hair Day.
Oh, well. Will be lovely surprise one day. Girl friend with hairless, smooth, brown legs. Like the Veet Lady.
'Wow! Look at your legs!' Middle Son will say.
'What?' New Girl Friend will ask, somewhat confused.
'No hair!' Middle Son will say, merrily. 'You should see My Mother's.'
Girl Friend will look at my legs from time to time, encased by then in Thick Beige Nylon Hold Ups.
Depressing.
Next life am coming back as Highland Cow.
Have its legs now anyway.


(P.S. Am concerned that readers will think that have thick pelt on legs all year. Not true.
Just the Winter Months.
So that's OK then.)

20 comments:

Pam said...

If your son has a blonde hairless girlfriend, take solace in the fact that she will burn like buggery in hot weather so she'll have hairless, red legs (spoken from experience).
I have yet to meet a woman that doesn't go a bit native over the winter months. That's the joy of cold weather!

Robynn's Ravings said...

I'm probably the only woman in the world whose husband couldn't care less if she grew a pelt and I don't want to. Have gf's who do but I must shave for the sheer smoothness of it. But "hairs" to you and your fur!

geraldgee said...

Dont see any problem on your header photo :O)

trasha said...

Surely this is why God invented the colder months?

Midlife Jobhunter said...

You are a woman after my own heart. I never shave in winter, which is much harder to do now as I live in a warm climate. Summer lasts much longer. I do think it is starting to thin out however. Perhaps one perk of middle age.

Mud in the City said...

As if hairy legs are't enough to contend with - yesterday I found a bristle on my chin. It is rapidly going downhill from here...

BT said...

lol. My son and daughter in law always comment if my legs are a bit hairy!! Why should I shave them? No idea, I'm not particularly hirsute anyway. Blokes are funny things.

Womanatwork said...

Brilliant, I think that the boys of today are growing up with very strange ideas about what women should look like. By god they're going to get a shock when they get involved with real women!

Mum Gone Mad said...

Ah yes they yeti months as I like to call them lol, only to be interrupted by swimming parties where you have to accompany the youngsters :( can you guess what I have to do on sunday?

Catharine Withenay said...

Got a little paranoid about my legs after a (supposedly good, close) friend started calling me Monkey Legs.

Always wear long trousers, I say...

Valerie said...

Blonde is easy, no-one can see the hairs. Loved the ending of your post, going off giggling to make the tea.

wonderwoman said...

must admit i very rarely shave legs in winter - need to keep warm is my excuse!!!

x

Reasons to be Cheerful 1,2,3 said...

Take me somewhere it's warm enough to get my legs out and I'll shave them gladly!

Ladybird World Mother said...

All you lovely lot -
Thank you thank you for your lovely comments and all! Glad to hear that we all seem to 'go a bit native' (thanks Pam!) now and then... will let you know about future girl friend and her hairless legs, but you may all need to wait for another five years or so... Middle Son only 11. (He went to a Sex Education class at school the other day. Asked him how it was.
'Rather unpleasant,' he said. Right. Don't have to worry about that yet, then.)Oh and Gerald G, header page was taken in the Summer Months. Derr.
Sorry to be such a lazy cow (highland?!) and do one comment. End of term and SO MUCH TO DO BEFORE HOLIDAYS. Which started 4 hours ago. Gulp.

Tattie Weasle said...

Actually I only do the bottom bit of my legs 'cos that's the only bit people see....perhaps I should reconsider!

Ladybird World Mother said...

Tattie W - me too! This is why son thinks all woman should do top half of leg too!!! Oh dear. x

DJ Kirkby said...

I'd like to leave a witty comment but I can't stop laughing long enough to think of one!

Ladybird World Mother said...

DJK - oh I am glad you had a giggle... !

Troy said...

Is photo of Veet lady or you?

Ladybird World Mother said...

Me!!! Not. Shame.