Wednesday, 16 September 2009

The Joys of Sex. Not.

Following on from the 'Choosing Desire' post of yesterday, thought I would share with you a little Snapshot of our life of Passion. With No Locks. And Children.
Anyway.
Was once, in a frisky and long distance past, having a Nice Time, as it were, with Husband, when in came child. Husband was most definitely at the Wrong End.
'What are you doing?' asked Child.
Husband says, in rather muffled tones, as he emerges from bed clothes.
'Oh, I am just checking Mummy's label on her pyjamas.'
Yeah.
Right.
I wasn't wearing any.
'Thank you, darling,' I said, brightly to Husband. 'Is it still there?'
'Yes!' he answered, equally Bright. 'Still there!'
'Oh, Goody!' said I.
Pink cheeked, we were.
My toes still Curl Right Up and Over when I think of it.

20 comments:

Troy said...

You write so cleverly! I'm sure your children will too with two cunning linguists as parents.

Lakeland Jo said...

quick thinking.
Kids are definitely the best form of contraception

Ladybird World Mother said...

!!!Only you, Troy, only you!!
Lakeland Jo - was rather, I thought. Considering.... x

Jeff D'Antonio said...

No comment. You know my story.

No amount of quick and creative thinking could have saved that moment.

trashalou said...

Afetr a very close call this weekend am in stitches laughing. there but for the grace of God ....




word verif: bacee (pronounced bachee is Italian for kiss. I merely report it as I see it ;-)

Corey Schwartz said...

Ha! Good one. Though I would gone for the old "playing hide and seek" trick :)

joolzmac said...

Too funny!

Joolz

Tatersmama said...

Lol... been there, done that!
My quick thinking excuse was that daddy was trimming my toenails for me.. and he didn't have his glasses on.

I thought we had gotten away with it, unil my daughter pointed out that I had cut my own toenails when I did hers the night before.
Bwahahaha!

Diane said...

Troy's comment made me snort tea!

And darlin', you MUST get locks!!!

Neas Nuttiness said...

I must learn to cross my legs before reading your posts. I laugh so hard I just about wet my pants!

Midlife Jobhunter said...

I have to wonder how much those peeps twist them. Guess we'll find out when they're in therapy.

Mud in the City said...

Your children are just very lucky to have 2 parents who still fancy each other enough to Get It On.

They just might not realise it yet!

Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy said...

As others have said.. there but for the grace of god...

Catharine Withenay said...

Once ... family room in hotel ... comment from son (who we'd thought was asleep) to his sister (likewise) "Mummy and Daddy were playing."

Kevin Musgrove said...

"Is it still there?"

You scamp!

elizabethm said...

Love it. How great it is to have a house with no need to lock doors any more!

Ladybird World Mother said...

Oh, thank you, one and all for all the wonderful comments!! Glad to know we are not the only ones... trimming toenails, indeed, Tatersmama!!
Forgive one general comment again... week is madly busy. Have a good weekend, y'all.
XXX

Elise said...

You have written this so well - thank you. Have a lovely weekend

imbeingheldhostage said...

This would be so much more funny if it didn't happen to us within this last month. Hubby went straight out and bought a lock :-)

Ladybird World Mother said...

Elise - we so will... locks galore. Have a good one too. As it were.
imbeingheldhostage - oh dear oh dear!! sorry to hear that... glad you now have a lock. Most Important when in houses with children. :) xx