Friday, 28 August 2009

Knock, Knock, Who's There?

Wiping Youngest's bottom today.
'Mummy?' His voice muffled as somewhere near the floor.
'Yes?'
'Knock, Knock.'
(Oh, God. A joke.)
'Who's there?' I say, busily wiping.
'Joke, Joke.' Says Youngest.
'What?' I say, somewhat puzzled. Even by his standards, this joke Stinks. Unlike his bottom which is now Pristine.
'Joke, Joke, Who?' asks Youngest. Returning to upright position.
I stall. Isn't it me who has to say the 'who' bit at the end?
'Joke, Joke, Who, Who?' I say.
Totally confused now.
'Dog,' says Youngest.
I laugh uproariously. At Some Length.
(Am Good At Appreciating Crap Jokes. Years of experience.)
Youngest stunned by obvious Success of Joke.
'Mummy, it's not that funny,' he says. Concerned.
'Well, I thought it was,' I say. Washing hands briskly and asking him to do the same.

Honestly. Sometimes you just can't win.

17 comments:

Sara said...

I have a not-so-young youngest with a huge repertoire of middling to terrible jokes - aided & abetted by his Grandad! OOPS didn't realise he was reading over my shoulder. His jokes are great to fantasmagorical! (apparently!)

Jeff D'Antonio said...

Ahh, the dreaded knock-knock-jokes-that-make-no-sense phase (they didn't teach us about that phase in the developmental psych class I took in school, but apparently all children go through it somewhere around the age of three or four).

My "tell it like it is" personality always wanted to tell her the truth and explain how knock knock jokes are supposed to work, but my heart always got in the way and I ended up doing the fake laugh thing anyway. The satisfied look in her eyes resulting from her success at making me laugh was always worth it in the end.

Looking forward to the start of that phase with child #3.

Working Mum said...

Not a funny joke, but a very funny blog post!

Troy said...

I too would wash my hands of that joke.

Ask youngest why the toilet roll rolled down the hill? To get to the bottom.

Hopefully a tad better.

Valerie said...

Beautifully told tale. I used to hate those knock knock jokes... smiles.

Alix said...

Knock knock...

Your're a hoot.

Mud in the City said...

If he's old enough to tell jokes, isn't he old enough to wipe his own bottom?

(you can tell I don't have children)

Tatersmama said...

Lol... Been there, done that!
It's maddening sometimes, but you'll have great memories to look back on.
Or at least that's what they say anyway.

My kids here seem to go through the "knock knock" phase every so often, and I haven't heard one yet that makes any sense!

Corey Schwartz said...

Oh, ha! Good you're getting this all down for him to read later :)

Matthew said...

I remember carrying a joke book around with me constantly for at least 6 months when I was little.

In retrospect, I must have been exceptionally tiresome.

Nancy said...

LOL! I remember those jokes.

The Dotterel said...

It's kind of got a surreal quality, a bit of Spike Milligan about it! I think it's funny, too.

DJan said...

Yes, I agree that although the joke wasn't funny, the post was, maybe because of the writer?

Reasons to be Cheerful 1,2,3 said...

Now I get this too and I thought by 10 he'd have grown out of it but they get worse!

CIELO said...

such cute post... and pretty blog... love your banner too!

Cielo

Ladybird World Mother said...

Thank you, thank you, one and all! Sorry to do this general thing again... awfully rude. But children are complaining about time I am spending on blogging... they told Husband today at breakfast how boring I am and how I never do anything else. Charming. Especially as I have made Great Efforts Not To Blog Too Much. Bugger it. Anyway... am off to watch the rest of Top Gear with them, so that there are no more complaints today at least. Roaring fire too as its a bit nippy. Lovely. (fire, not the nippy bit)
Thanks again!!xxx

Clippy Mat said...

that joke made perfect sense to me. however i have just spent the weekend with a 4 yr old knock knock expert who seems to have the same sense of humour as your youngest. :-)