Monday, 22 February 2010

Out To Dinner

Went out to supper on Saturday night. Drove down the lane, up another one, and there we were. Pouring with rain. So the sight of champagne and a roaring fire did much to cheer us.
Drinks and chat before supper. When my mobile rang.
Dammit. Probably a child Wanting Something.
Sure enough, Youngest was breathing heavily down the phone.
Mummy, he whispered. Hoarsely.
I put on my bright Mummy voice. Raised it up a notch or two.
Hello darling, I twinkled. Guests watching, curious.
Youngest continued to breathe very heavily, while whispering something of Great Urgency. Which I couldn't understand. I hoped, with every fibre of my being, that he didn't want his bottom wiped. That would be dull. But not past all possibilities, that I would have to stomp back down the road, wipe said bottom, and return to party.
Husband will huff and puff. But cannot expect babysitter, or Middle Son, or Daughter, or God forbid, Youngest himself, to do neat job of it. As it were.
Found out that his bottom was perfectly clean. Thank God.
Worked out, with some difficulty, owing to the Whispering, that he was on his way to bed.
Prayers, Mummy, he hissed. Whispering very spittily down the phone.
What??? I asked. Still baffled.
This was repeated at some length, with increasing desperation. And then finally,
Prrrayyeerrrrrrrrrrs, Mummmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeee, he breathed. In a tortured sort of way.
Got it. Suddenly. As you do.
You want to say your prayers with me on the phone? I asked. Trying hard not to smile fondly, or let smile show in my voice.
Came the answer.
Right, I said. Moving to a place in the house where guests would not find it odd to see me reciting the Our Father to a book case.
And we began.
Youngest very quietly saying Amen at the end of each prayer, but not joining in, in case the babysitter thought him rather odd. Or something.
Found myself praying, on Youngest's behalf, for a safe lodging and a holy rest, and thanking Him for a lovely day, And a lovely lunch, added Youngest, quite crossly, as if I had deliberately left it out.
Finished. Checking over my shoulder that no one could hear this somewhat eccentric exchange.
Told Youngest I loved him. Told him to go upstairs to bed.
Asked him to get Daughter on the phone.
On she came... and agreed to kiss Youngest goodnight and tuck him in.
As it seemed he needed it that night.
And back I went to the champagne and Canapes.
Husband raised questioning eyebrow.
No need to wipe bottoms tonight, I said, gaily.
Hooray! he said.
And so we returned to our Grown Up World.


Vicus Scurra said...

How very moving. It made me want to whisper hoarsely down the telephone to you.
But the judge has forbidden me to do that again.

DJan said...

Yes, very moving. I think you are one of the most fortunate mommies I know, and your offspring don't know how lucky they are. But one day, they will know... You gave me tears of happiness just now...

Tatersmama said...

You're such a good Mummy! Thank goodness it wasn't a bottom wiping emergency, but sometimes prayers are the most pressing need of all... and your little one knows it.
Oh my goodness! The: "Right, I said. Moving to a place in the house where guests would not find it odd to see me reciting the Our Father to a book case."
What PERFECT writing!
I <3 it!

Bernie said...

What a wonderful mother you are and I am so glad you were able to continue on with your great evening, you deserved it.....Hugs

June said...

I hope you remember that's one of the most heartwarming Mommy Stories I have ever heard or read.

Kathy G said...

Youngest certainly has his priorities in the right order if hee couldn't go to bed until his prayers were said!

Mud in the City said...

Brilliant. Sure the bookcase appreciated it too.

Heather said...

what a wonderful story, I'm sure i would have had a couple of tears in my eyes if that were me. but it is nice to be able to put that phone down and go back to grownup time, huh?

Sir Bruin said...

What a very fine young man you have there.

Sir Bruin said...

What a very fine young man you have there.

Troy said...

What a sweet story!
And a good job they had their canapes seeing it was pouring with rain.

Catharine Withenay said...

Gorgeous! How wonderful to have that grown-up time, and yet still able to be 100% real and there for your son. Thank goodness it wasn't the poo!

geraldgee said...

So pleased you@ve got past bloggers block and back to your usual brilliance xx

geraldgee said...

Novel way of spelling you've ?

Strawberry Jam Anne said...

What a lovely thing to happen LWM. You and your children have a wonderful relationship. I hope your hosts know how fortunate they are to have a friend like you. A x

Ladybird World Mother said...

What amazingly lovely comments... even hoarse breathing, VC!... sorry for Big Cop Out One Comment Fits All... manic here... trying to fit in too much. Prayers last night did not go so well, as Youngest was in a Mood. At the end of each prayer he went 'Amen and Shut up Mummy.' Cant win 'em all.
Thanks all... lovely to read all these. xxxx

Leilani Lee said...

Your post almost made me weep, especially thinking about the ridiculous mobile-phone conversations I have heard at restaurants and in grocery stores and in the women's toilet at the department store.

Robynn's Ravings said...

Oh THANK YOU for the jolly laughs this morning as I envisioned you saying your "Our Father" to the bookcase! I needed that and have missed you! Thanks for stopping by. Now I'm reading this to my son. He will relate. When he was your son's age it HAD to be mommy that said prayers with him. They didn't get through otherwise!

Love and hugs from a very damp California!

Robynn's Ravings said...

P.S. SCURRA! Bwahahahahahahahaha!

Tattie Weasle said...

They do get you like that those heartwarming moments when they are total angels - shame it doesn't happen to me in Waitrose - then it's the bottom ones or else the screaming demonic monster moments...ah me! Brilliant post!

皮東 said...


健康保寶 said...

很喜歡你的blog哦...加油唷 ........................................

Ladybird World Mother said...

LL - it was a bit sweet! Agree with overheard mobile conversations... some are just so bizarre, or else EXTREMELY boring!
RR - how lovely to see you!!! Have been worrying over your absence... hope you feel a little better. xxx
TW - screaming demonic moments are so not good, i agree!! For once this was a good moment. They dont come that often! x
To the comment after Tattie Weasel... couldnt cut and paste your name!! - 這是如此真實。謝謝您發表評論!
And the next commenter after that! -非常感謝你。我喜歡沒有中國符號的博客!

Hope the rest of you are impressed with my use of the Google Translator. Rather fun too. xx

diney said...

I loved that post! Brilliant to be able to get back to grown ups after the intimate exchange though! I'm pleased to meet you and thanks for calling into mine. I will be following you.... (it sounds a threat, but I mean it nicely!!!

Hadriana's Treasures said...

I love your use of Chinese. You are very fluent! Chin, chin and all that. Well done to little man too.

Ladybird World Mother said...

diney - how lovely to see you! Glad you liked the post, and so glad that you are following the nicest possible way!
Hadriana - am rather proud of my chinese!! Damned easy... google makes doing anything rather easy. Now off to read your new post. xx