Friday, 13 January 2012

Pee'sd off

Christ, have done it again.
Very Nice Man came round to fix the gutter, which had been ripped off during storms of late (causing much grief in night as one heard the bang bang banging of loose guttering about six feet away from head ALL NIGHT LONG).
Very Nice Man arrived with very long ladder and proceeded to go up very long ladder to wrench bastard guttering away from roof and replace with new. Hooray!
I hovered at the bottom of ladder while Very Nice Man shouted a lot from the top of the ladder. Most of which I couldn't hear, as he was face to face with roof, and sound was rather muffled.
Offered him some tea. Called for dog who was sniffing about. Dog came, and neatly cocked his leg and pee'd all over the Very Nice Man's tool box.
While Very Nice Man was still speaking I backed into utility room, which was conveniently placed just behind me, grabbed large wad of loo paper also conveniently placed just behind me, and made for the tool box, loo paper hidden behind my back.
Very Nice Man was still talking.
Bent over double quick, wiped back, forward, sideways and a quick flourish to finish, and made for the compost heap with what I hoped was a Nonchalent sort of walk.
Very Nice Man didn't have a clue.
Thought that I really ought to wipe it with proper antibacterial wipes, so went back into house.
But phone rang, I got distracted, and the next thing I knew was the Very Nice Man was at my front door with his tool box.
Bye, he said, cheerily.
Bye! I said back. Not looking at tool box.
Which was decidedly damp.


Vicus Scurra said...

I am going to find him, tell him and get him to urinate on your clematis.

Liz said...


cheshire wife said...

Ignorance is bliss!

Ladybird World Mother said...

VS - !!! Just my clematis? xx
Liz- Ooops indeed
CW -Sure is, hope he never finds out, bless him.

Mother Hen said...

Have been there, done that but had to fess up as plumber was watching it happen too!!! Fortunately, the culprit was only a puppy so he thought it was cute.

London City Mum said...

Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha...

Only you.


wonderwoman said...

I definitely wouldnt have said a word!!!!

Ladybird World Mother said...

MH - SO much easier when cute and a puppy... sigh. x
LCM - I know, I know... WHEN will I be a real grownup? x
ww - Thank god for that.. am not the only flake then! Phew. x

Ladybird World Mother said...

MH - SO much easier when cute and a puppy... sigh. x
LCM - I know, I know... WHEN will I be a real grownup? x
ww - Thank god for that.. am not the only flake then! Phew. x

Troy said...

Very amusing - and that was even after I'd worked out that "tool box" wasn't a euphemism.

Ladybird World Mother said...

Troy - have missed you! Tool box indeed. x

Salviano Adão said...

VERY GOOD! BEAUTIFUL BLOG! I believe that God created the
man and left the instruction manual? a, a 'B? BLIA
SACRED!? The B? BIBLE? reveals the divine? the word
of God and does the canned goods, I usually say
that: • People need to stop eating everything
that d? o. And eat? Air to question! ? Someone? M listening
something from someone? m, and speaking out, without
questioning, wondering if? true or not? o. The
People need to ask! Being? that my
cren? to this according to the law of God? Being? that
the religion? what I was born I was always told the truth?
When a person dies it goes to where? It
back? The b? BLIA supports homosexuality? Who DOES NOT
inherit the kingdom of God? What should I know about
idolatry, images and sculpture? What should I know
about? single baptism? Being? which has a single one? AGENCY
to save? it? Who do I confess me, who
can you forgive me? Religion? Saves someone? M? These and
other questions and answers:
You? can tell, I j? I am saved? m! Let's atr? S
who DOES NOT this one? If you? want to get along with
world is hip? crit, but if you? want to get along
It has to be true!? Share this site
because:? Behold v? m days, saith the Lord Jehovah? in
will send a famine on earth, no? the famine of p? the,
nor a thirst for? water, but of hearing the words of
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and at the north? the east; run? throughout the
to seek the word of the Lord, and n? to the
find? o. "(Am? s 8 see Chapter 11 and 12) Tell
others, why? n Lord? the delays
his promise, as some t? m by late: but
? long? nimo to you, no? the willing that any
lost, sin? that all should come to repentance.
? (II Peter chapter 3. See 8) and 'What does it all
men to be saved and come to the knowledge of
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Know the truth and the truth shall make you free
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Sir Bruin said...

I wouldn't have 'fessed up either.
On the bright side, it could have been worse.

trash said...

God has obviously sent you a message in that comment up there but I can't tell if it was promising vengeance or forgiveness.

Ladybird World Mother said...

Sir B - indeed it could, imagine box of eggs, yeurch. x
Trash - I know!! Am keeping very quiet in case he comes back. x

Catharine Withenay said...

You're right. I wouldn't have owned up.
Thank you for making me smile on a grey, dull day!
(And, given my recent experience with builders, I think I'd now be tempted to go and urinate on all their tools. At least you mopped some of it up!)